The Complexity of Yielding to the Brain Damage

© 2000 Michele Toomey, PhD


June 6, 2000

There is a great challenge to yielding. It requires a certain standing still, but if the orientation and timing aren't right, the still becomes passive, and yielding is anything but passive.

The rhythm of yielding is a primary quality that preserves its power. To yield to the condition of post encephalitis without becoming victim of it is dependent on timing.

First yield to the truth of what is happening. Being awakened, feeling agitated, feeling annoyed, feeling trapped, feeling powerless, being worried, wanting to sleep, wanting it all to go away. Then yield to the integrity of being true to the truth. Sounds corny, but as you know, it is stabilizing and calming. "We are safe when we are true." ("Her Fear")

In the calmness will come the capacity to fall back asleep. Funny, how sleep is an expression of yielding to fatigue. The sleep will be the "bringing forth" capacity of yielding. Obviously, we are bumping into the essence of the dilemma of post encephalitis. Yielding to it in the truest sense of the word. Not accepting it, not becoming it, not being the victim of it, but, yielding to the truth of its devastation and then yielding and bringing forth the truth of how you are dealing with it... the commitment to creatively, caringly, respectfully, diligently, faithfully, attending to each and every damaged aspect of your mind and body, heart and soul... and the integrity it brings... the miracle it allows to emerge... the capacity for liberation in its fullest sense that occurs.

In the end, we weep even as we rejoice, we are fatigued beyond measure even as we are rejuvenated, we despair even as we hope, we are caught in tragedy even as we are in awe of the recovery.

We must continue to explore the complex nature of yielding, for we are all being challenged to yield and bring forth. Our integrity and intimacy depend on it, so does our life.

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