We have several choices. We can give up. We can fake it. We can become superficial and coast on glib. We can grudgingly plod along. Or we can stand tall, find our stride and "keep on keeping on."
The after effects of herpes simplex encephalitis force you to choose every day. Memory alone complicates the choice. Each day is new. Each approach that day is like a re-discovery of what is being asked and how you will respond. Each day you have chosen to "keep on keeping on."
Whatever bodily energy confronts you, what ever memory lapse or eclipse, whatever hurdle or opportunity, whatever mood hovers over or envelopes you, you steadfastly choose to try to "deal with it" and go on. There is a stamina in your determination that defies the odds. What is its source? It's not in your physicality. It is in your spirit and your strong desire for an intimte life of integrity. That indomitable spirit was not affected by the encephalitis. You struggled to breathe for 3 days before you were put on the respirator. You tried to talk when you were coming out of the coma, even when it was gibberish. You maximize every opportunity, yoga, tai chi, acupunture, and, of course, therapy. You "keep on keeping on" long after I have had it. How can we not, when you are? We can't. You are insisting that we keep on keeping on. Good for you and thank you. It is, by far, the option of choice and of worth. We are, we will, we have no choice, yet, it is our choice. We do choose to "keep on keeping on."